by Terri LaPoint
Health Impact News

It’s that day again – Mother’s Day. Only, for some, there is nothing “happy” about it. It is supposed to be that sappy, heart-warming day where mothers are celebrated, and all is flowers and sunshine. But for too many of our readers, Mother’s Day is a very tough day. For some, it may be the hardest holiday of all.

This is for you.

This is also for those who have lost their mothers, and for some, it is the first Mother’s Day without being able to hug your mom or talk to her on the phone.

This is for the mothers with a big, empty place in your heart because a child is gone too soon from this life, through miscarriage, stillbirth, tragedy, or disease, or because Child Protective Services has taken your child away, and you won’t even get to see your precious babies.

Mother’s Day can be a reminder of just how unfair life can be, and you try to keep it together as you scroll through all the happy, smiley Facebook posts of friends and their mothers, or friends and their children. All the while, there is a great big lump in your throat and all you want to do is scream and break through the empty facade.

You ARE a mom, but cruel fate and a corrupt system has stolen from you something that nothing in this world can replace. Maybe you are right now in the fight of your life trying to get your children back. Or you did everything you knew to do, but it still didn’t get your kids back. Some OTHER woman is getting the Mother’s Day card that you should be getting.

Maybe Mother’s Day is hard because you were in foster care yourself, or you were with your mom, but she wasn’t really there for you.

Whatever the reason, for too many, Mother’s Day can seem like a great big mockery.

It’s ok to cry. It’s ok to call a friend. It’s ok to BE where you are, because it hurts, and the sunshine and roses may be painful reminders of what isn’t.

Know that you are not alone this Mother’s Day. There are people all around you who are going through stuff, or who have been there before. Some are putting on nice, happy smiley faces and pretending everything is fine, while they are crumbling inside.

Reach out to a friend and tell them what you are going through.

Post this on your wall, and say, “This is me. I am having a hard day.”

Hopefully those around you will pause in their happy day, and put an arm around you and say, “I care.” Or maybe they will send you a few words to let you know they’ve been there too. They may even thank you for being honest enough with your pain that they are able to acknowledge their own pain.

If this doesn’t describe you, but you are going to a church service that is celebrating moms, pay attention. If there is a woman there without her children, alone, don’t let her suffer alone. Tell her that she matters. That her children matter. That she is STILL a mom and always will be, no matter what any organization says. You can’t fix it. But you can support her, and pray for her.

There are some wounds that nothing anyone can do can make it better. But there is a whole lot that we can do to make the pain more bearable.

So if this is a Happy Mother’s Day for you, great! That is wonderful. But if Mother’s Day is a really difficult day for you to get through, know that there are other people who are struggling to get through this day as well. Know that you are still so very valuable and loved by the Lord.

You are still a mother. Nothing will ever change that.